Thoughts on the 22nd

Last month I couldn't come up with anything to write about. This month there's too much. So I've bolded all the interesting parts if you don't have time to read it all.

Did you know I've been having ear problems again? You know how I said I was going to splurge on dairy-filled Easter treats? Well, I'm not positive if it's related but shortly after my splurge my ear started draining and it hasn't stopped. We've tested it for everything and it's all been negative. My ENT seems all too eager to "just rip the whole thing out." I felt like I really burst his bubble when I actually questioned the idea. He said that twice he has made a hole leading out behind the ear. That way you could put drops into that hole and the drops would go directly into the mastoid bone. But in those 2 cases the cause of the mastoid problems had been identified so the appropriate drops were administered. My questions are as follows--say we "rip the whole thing out" but it still doesn't solve the problem. What then? Also, what if this happens to the other side? And lastly, can I eat dairy if we "rip the whole thing out?" Because if I had to choose, I would choose dairy over hearing. But only if it were hearing out of one ear. I wouldn't chose dairy over complete deafness. I spoke with a well-respected ENT on the phone, He couldn't say too much without actually seeing my CT scans, etc. but he did allay my fear that the idea of "ripping everything out" is completely crazy. It's not unheard of and there are instances where it's needed. He suggested that I could do more extensive allergy testing. He also suggested getting a second opinion if nothing else but to make me feel more confident in whatever is decided.

I quit physical therapy. I liked it. It was useful. The series of stretches and exercises I was given have been very helpful. But each time I would go I would do the entire series of exercises in front of them (even though I do them twice a day at home). Then I would be shown one new exercise. I asked if we could streamline it a bit since I didn't have insurance, and just spend ten minutes giving me the new exercise but it doesn't work that way. So I had to quit before I got too annoyed with paying 65 dollars a week just for one new exercise I could find on the internet.

Speaking of PT, I can't stand it. Unfortunately, like I said, the exercises help. So I have to do it. It's the most boring and tedious 30 minutes of my day. It's supposed to be 60 minutes of my day since I should do them all twice, but I can't bring myself to do them all over again.

I've started swimming though and actually feel like I'm exercising for the first time in 5 months. But newsflash: SWIMMING IS HARD. I feel like I'm going to die. With running there were times that I felt like I was going to die. You know, I felt like my legs and lungs were burning and that I couldn't go much farther. But with swimming when I feel like I'm going to die, I feel an actual fear that my lungs will fill with water, my heart will stop beating, and my spirit will leave my body. I have improved in the few weeks I've been swimming though. What started with swimming down and back, then gasping for air for a full minute before swimming another lap has turned into a legitimate 30 minutes of swimming. I can still only manage 4 lengths of the pool in freestyle before needing to switch to backstroke or breaststroke, but it's definite improvement. I still need some breathing breaks too. And I'm extremely slow. Today I swam 46 lengths in 30 minutes. Just as a comparison: My sister in law is 9 months pregnant and swam 80 lengths. She said, "Yeah, but I'm slow. It took me 45 minutes."

While swimming is pretty fun, and feels like legitimate exercise I'm still a little bitter over the whole, "You shouldn't run" thing. I liked running. I felt good at it. I knew a lot about it. And I always felt like I had gotten a good work out. And without getting dramatic, it's more than that. So if you wonder why I'm not commenting on your, "I just ran in a race" post it's because I didn't read it.

Lately, my face has been breaking out like I'm in high school.

You know, every time I look up information about teaching good eating habits I always come across the same advice. Parents provide what is offered and when it is offered. Kids decide what to eat from what is offered and how much to eat. Period. It's not that Jane eats bad food. In fact, she really only eats healthy foods, but she doesn't eat a wide variety. I usually have to encourage her try what's for dinner. I don't force her, but she's not going to eat veggies (except for carrots and lettuce) unless I ask her too. And I usually encourage her to finish. Otherwise she's whining at me in 10 minutes that she's hungry again. Anyway, I decided I was going to try an experiment and follow those guidelines strictly for a month. I just wanted to see what would happen. The night before I started I explained to Jane how everything was going to go down the next day. She got very excited and said, "Ok, let's pretend you give me chicken, and rice, and peas." I thought, "this is going to be awesome!" I pretended to give her those foods and then asked, "Okay what are you going to eat?" She said with a big grin, "Just rice!!" My experiment only lasted a few days. I couldn't take it. I knew she would eat certain things if I just asked her to. Or she wouldn't finish her oatmeal, even though she likes it because she wanted to eat all strawberries. Well, why can't I tell her she needs to eat oatmeal AND strawberries? So, I didn't get it. Hopefully we're not doing anything too bad. I don't use treats or dessert as a reward (anymore). And I don't punish her when she won't eat something. I hope she grows up to be a healthy eater!

I guess I hadn't ever thought about it, or I was just really naive, but I was extremely bothered when I passed a sign that said in huge letters "SUBSIDIZE YOUR INCOME!" Then in smaller font, "Foster parents needed."

Jane and I have really been getting on each other's nerves lately. Well, I guess I can't speak for her, but sheesh, she has been driving me just a little bit nutty. So we went on a "date" last Saturday. It was really, really nice. While eating dinner I said, "I'm sure glad Heavenly Father gave you to me. I love you so much." She got a huge smile on her face and took an excited in-take of breath, a gasp, if you will, and said, "I'm so happy....you're so happy, too!....we should hug." So we did. And since then I've been noticing all the sweet and wonderful things about her more often and less of the other stuff. So that just goes to show how important it is to go on dates. Now if only Matt and I could go out...

I was doing some ironing in the living room. It was a lot of fabric so while I was repositioning the fabric I would set the iron on the window sill. I heard a really loud pop but couldn't find where it had come from. Later I noticed a big crack in the window. I guess the heat from the iron busted the window!

I was talking with some friends and they started talking about their contacts. They were surprised I never sleep in my contacts. I take them out faithfully every night. I'm not the biggest fan of my current contacts. They get dry and blurry by the end of the day. My friends both use Proclear contacts which they love. You are supposed to put them in at the beginning of the month and not take them out until the end of the month when you're ready to throw them away. And they're actually supposed to be better for your eyes because they allow 100% more oxygen in or something like that. I really, really want them. But the reason I'm telling you this is because one of my friends said she never pays for contacts. She goes once a year to her optometrist for her prescription and for the complimentary free trial pair of Proclear contacts. She said she doesn't take them out (EVER!) until her next appointment a year later!!! And the optometrist always says her eyes look healthy, AND her prescription strength always improves.

A lady knocked on my door selling Advanage cleaner. On one hand I can't stand the way they spell their product's name. On the other hand, it has gotten ball point pen ink out of fabric before my very eyes. I would buy it if I could. But I wouldn't have bought it from this lady. I remember being approached about Advanage cleaner before. I remember the boy selling it. I can remember several other people who have tried to sell things to me. And you have to trust me when I tell you--I know for a fact I have never seen this lady before in my life. But her door approach was this, "Awww, hey girl! I remember you from last year! How you doin'?" In the course of the ten minute conversation she mentioned that she remembered me from last year about 7 times. When Jane came in the room she said, "Oh, boy! She's gotten taller!" As I stood there, unable not to smile at the hilarity of what was taking place before me, she said, "Oh, you are so funny! You were just like that last year. Always smiling." If only I had the guts to call her out. Instead I could only think about the fact that not only is she insulting my intelligence to think that I would just believe her that we have met before, but I'm supposed to believe that she could possibly remember every person she had a 5-10 minute conversation with the year before AND the height of their children? Before leaving she said, "Now, is it still the same people next door as lived their last year?" I said no. She seemed disappointed she would have to use another selling strategy with them.

I'm in the (bad) habit of hanging my bras on the corner of the laundry basket in our room. I had a couple there one day, set them aside while emptying the basket, and then thought I had put them back. Later in the day I went to retrieve one. I couldn't find them. I looked everywhere. Jane had seen me move them so I had to assume she had taken them. So after searching my entire room I resorted to looking under her bed, in her drawers, and anywhere I thought she might stash them. But when I asked her about it she genuinely seemed not to know. I eventually gave up. In the back of my mind I couldn't help but wonder if the bra theif of 2004 had somehow tracked me down again. You see, in 2004 I was living with my friends Kate and Laura. We were hanging out and one of us mentioned how we had misplaced our bras. Then the other two chimed in with, "What? I can't find mine either." Come to find out all of the bras in our apartment, except for the ones we had been wearing on a certain day, were gone. Well, except for a few ratty ones of Laura's that the thief wasn't interested in. But really, someone had gone into our apartment and stolen our bras. Kind of freaky. It almost made us start locking our door. But back to my current problem--Where were my bras you ask? Well, somehow they had ended up in this pile of lovelies.

Unfortunately, Matt had just "cleaned up" because it was laundry day, so this is the pile looking better than usual. I love you Matt, but, this isn't my favorite thing that you do.