Jack's turn

Oh, Jack.  Jack has been a bit firey if you will.  Let me warn you--if you engage in a battle of wills with Jack you WILL lose.  I should also warn you that if you take a toy from him because you've asked him several times to help clean up he will throw a big, heavy toy lantern right at your head in front of your two mommy friends and all of their children.

I'm trying very very hard to figure out how to help Jack through his angry phase without simply giving into his every demand.  The teensiest amount of frustration or annoyance in my voice will send him spiraling out of control.  So I have been trying to show insane amounts of patience.  And only occasionally has it ended with me FLIPPING out when he's hit me and yelled at me and told me he hates me for the fiftieth time.

Let's say he asked for a cookie for breakfast and I said he couldn't have a cookie but he could choose cereal or oatmeal.  Then let's say Jack flies off the handle about how mean I am and how I don't love him because I won't let him have a cookie.  Let's say he then tells me that if I don't give him a cookie he will "rip me".  And then he settles on just hitting me instead.  All the while I talk to him in the nicest voice possible assuring him that I love him but that he will have to sit on time-out because when you hit and yell you have to sit on time-out.  And then he threatens to break the time-out chair if I don't let him get off.  And I'm all smiles and sweet talk and somehow thirty minutes later and his 3 minute time-out is FINALLY over and Jack has accepted that he will have oatmeal for breakfast he will almost always say something like, "I like to rip bad guys."  or "I hate bad guys." or "I will yell at bad guys."  He doesn't like to let go of his anger completely, but he decides that he will channel it in a more appropriate direction.  Almost after every time-out he declares his hatred of bad guys.  It's pretty funny, if you're in the mood to think something is funny at that point.

But Jack continues to charm everyone outside of the house.  His church teachers adore him and always have something cute or nice to report about Jack.  His school teachers tell me how obedient and well behaved he is.  And I believe them because in between his anger outbursts he's such a kind and happy guy.  And when he's nice and loving and he calls me "mama" my heart melts and I resolve to be even more patient with him the next time he's acting like a maniac.

So let's talk about some of the more endearing things that Jack has said lately.

Matt was holding him after his bath with him all wrapped up in his towel. I was sitting nearby and he looked at me and said, "I'm cute......And you're cute."

I told Jack that he was going to have a little gift exchange at his preschool Christmas party.  Then he started to explain to someone else that he was going to get a teeny tiny present while pinching his fingers together to show how small.

Jack asked me for some Cheerios in a cup but I chose to go to the bathroom before getting them.  He stood outside the door and very dramatically said things like, "You're breaking my heart."  "You're hurting my life." and, "You're hurting my brain."

Jack went to the bathroom and asked me to help him wipe his bum.  When I walked in he excitedly told me, "It was splashing poo!  It splashed water on my butt.  It was awesome!"

We were watching some bible story videos on TV and Jack asked me for some Kix.  I couldn't get them because I was helping Hank.  He turned to the TV and said, "Get my Kix, please, Jesus."

Speaking of Kix, I love that both Jane and Jack make the singular form of Twix and Kix, Twick and Kick.

When Jack saw a younger man with a huge brown beard at church today he asked me, "Jesus came to church?"  The next week when we were sitting in front of that same man I saw that Jack was confused again and heard him say to himself, "But Jesus died.  He DIED."

I told Jack to answer me nicely by saying "Ok, mom."  He replied in his sassy way, "O doody K."

Here's a conversation he had with Matt.
"Dad, you're doody."
"Why am I doody?"
"Your clothes are doody."
"Really?  You're kind of hurting my feelings."
"You're hurting my feelings.
"What did I say to hurt your feelings?"
Then Jack thought for awhile and said, "You didn't say anything.  Your clothes are hurting my feelings."

Jack had a birthday party to attend one day.  I walked into the kitchen and said to Matt, "Jack needs to be at Jonny's at eleven."  Jack heard something completely different.  And said with both shock and amusement, "I? I gonna be my whole body in the oven? You gonna cook me?"

When Jane is frustrated with Matt she usually places a lot of emphasis on the last syllable, "DaDUH."  Matt teases her about it and now it's just a joke.  When Jack was frustrated with me he said, "MomDUH!"

Jack was singing a song to himself at the kitchen table.  He said, "Mom, don't listen to my song because it's a bad one."  So I left the room but kept listening.  He said, "I know that I love bad guys and that bad guys can hear me."  Heavens!

After seeing Matt gargle Jack said, "Dad, that's awesome.  When I get big maybe I can do that."

Jane finished putting all her melty beads on the cupcake form she had been working on.  When Jack saw that she had finished he exclaimed, "Oh, that's awesome!  Jane, you did it!  Jane, you're awesome!"

I'm really not sure what sparked this last comment from Jack but we were in his room and Jane was looking through some of her dress-ups.  Jack said, "I don't want to be cool.  I want to be pretty and beautiful."

So there you have it.  A cute little three year old boy who threatens to rip people but also longs to be beautiful.  He's a tough nut to crack.  Just look at all of these expressions and you can understand why I look at him sometimes and feel like I've never seen him before.